I had a tennis match last night at 8:00 P.M.—as in, eight o’clock in the evening. Eight is about an hour or so before I am normally heading to bed. It was rough. I was tired and it was late.

We lost, but as always, I had a great time playing. I really just love to play—even if I don’t win. I am so grateful that I am playing again after a three-year hiatus forced me to take a break. We played a fun team and it was a great match. After the match, my partner and approach the net to shake hands with our opponent.

We stood there for a bit, chatting, and as we did, I rubbed my nose. I swear to you something fell out. Nothing snotty, but something crusty. You know, one of those annoying boogers that sometimes flaps in the wind. But, I wasn’t 100% sure. So, I rubbed my nose again. I was left even more uncertain after the rub than I was before.

And, I rub again. Is there something there? I can’t tell. Now I think maybe it’s on the end of my nose. I smear my hand across my nose again, hoping to catch whatever I think I feel. Then, I notice my partner rubbing her nose. She’s giving me a singal, I think. She’s telling me it’s there—and to get it off. I rub my nose in response. She rubs her nose again. Then, I notice our opponents rubbing their noses. Are they all trying to tell me I have a bat in the cave? Or, do they think I am trying to tell them they have a nugget in the mine? They don’t. But do I? Who is telling who what?

I was so confused.

I dropped my hands to my side to see if they continued. Then, I thought I felt it on my lip. Oh, I panicked and all I could think was this little dry booger fell out of my nose and on to my lip and it’s just sitting there—stuck in my thick layer of Aquaphor. I use my hands to rub my lips, hoping to scrap it off. But, nothing. Then, they touch their lips. Dammit. What is the message? Are they signaling me or do they think I am signaling them? Is there something there I should be getting?

Finally, I had to end the conversation because it was almost 9:30PM and I couldn’t expend any more energy on trying to figure out who had the booger and where.

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